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poeticdiamond
Joined: Sep 29, 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 67
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 Posted: October 4, 2005 4:42 pm Post subject: Moulin Rouge |
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For those who have seen it, here are some made-up bloopers that some friends of mine wrote. I thought they were funny, so... here ya go.
The 2nd one:
SCENE: COUP D’ ETAT
Ewan [singing]: Come what may…Come –
[A large spitball flies out of his mouth, spraying Nicole’s face.]
Nicole: My eyes!
[She covers her face with her hands and runs out of the shot.]
Ewan [apologetically]: Sorry about that, Nic!
Baz [off-camera]: “Say” it, don’t “spray” it next time, Ewan.
Nicole [off-camera, in panic]: Medic!
Ewan [tries not to laugh]: At least we’re even for that hat thing, Nic!
Baz [off-camera, in exasperation]: CUT!
-
The 7th one:
SCENE: THE RED ROOM aka THE ELEPHANT
Nicole [screaming and thrashing around on the floor]: Oh! Yeeees! Don’t stop! More! Yes! Naughty! Give me more! Yeeeeeeessss!
[She pauses mid-squeal to glance up at the camera.]
Nicole: Can’t I stop yet?
Baz [off-camera, in amusement]: This is too much fun.
[Nicole collapses, face-down in disgust. Ewan’s grinning face pops into the left side of the shot.]
Ewan Hey, Baz – can I get a copy of this?
Nicole [still face-down]: Shut up, Ewan.
-
The 11th one:
SCENE: HINDI SAD DIAMONDS
Jim: She is mine…
Richard: She is mine…
[Jim and Nicole stand quite close together. Nicole tries to turn her head to her left, but her tiara is caught in the chains on Jim’s turban.]
Nicole: Baz! It’s happened again…
[Both try to walk in different directions at the same time.]
Jim & Nicole [simultaneously]: Ouch!
Baz [off-camera]: Just stop moving!
[Ignoring Baz, Nicole runs offstage, dragging Jim behind her.]
Nicole [off-camera, in panic]: Get this thing off my head!
Jim [off-camera, insulted]: I have a name, you know…
Baz [off-camera]: I need a drink...
-
The last one:
SCENE: ELEPHANT LOVE MEDLEY
Baz [off-camera] Alrighty, Elephant Love Medley. Take 4… Stand by, everyone…
Ewan [interrupting]: Hang on…watch this –
[He promptly leaps off the top of the Elephant. He does a few flips mid-air, while the safety harness keeps him from plummeting to the ground.]
Ewan: [laughs hysterically]: Lara Croft can kiss my Scottish arse!
Baz [off-camera]: Oh, Christ…
Ewan [mimicking U2’s Bono]: El – e – va – TION!
Baz [off-camera]: Ewan – get down!
Nicole [irritated]: Hey, that’s my line!
Baz [off-camera]: Why me…?
-
Nic: [gasps and falls]
Ewan: Hey a pigeon! [moves his arms]
Nic: [hits the floor] OW!!!
Ewan: Hehehe [running after the pigeon in hysterics]
Nic: For chrissakes Ewan!
Ewan: [snaps out of trance] Damn where'd the pigeon go
Baz: Bloody hell...what have I let myself in for?
-
Jim: Like a virgin!
Richard: [being spun round and getting dizzy]
Jim: [Carries on singing]
Richard: *hack* *hack* *cough*
Jim: Like a vi...ir...g...what the hell's wrong with him?
Richard: [going red] *gasping for air*
Jim: That's not the line!
Baz: [sighs] CUT!! What's going on
Richard: [rolling around on floor (because he's choking)]
Nic: [from off set] OI! Richard! I'm supposed to do that on the elephant!!
Jim: [realising] OH S**T!!!! He's choking on his false teeth!!!
Everyone except Jim and Richard: HOLY S**T! [run forward to help]
John: [running slowly] Damn these fake legs...
Nic: [grabs him and does the heimlich manoeuvre thingy]
Ewan: [taking the p*ss in high pitched girly voice] Oh! Yeeeesssss!! This is what I want!! Naughty words!!
Nic: [drops Richard who has now turned purple and turns to Ewan] You wanna piece of me motherf****r?!
Ewan: [stops][scared] Um....
Nic: [walking towards him threateningly]
Ewan: [high pitched girly scream and runs]
Jim: Hey that's my line
Richard: [lies on floor motionless]
Baz: [opens Richard's mouth] I'm not getting them out! eww!!
Jim: Oh for fu...[takes out false teeth and wipes hands on John]
John: NAH!!! [pouts]
Richard: [gets up miraculously]You guys took your f*****g time!!
Baz: wanna take that again boys?
Richard: not really...*cough*
Ewan: [in background] [high pitched girly scream]
Nic: You won't get away from me!!
-
And just one more:
Christian's Garrett [ come what may scene]
Nic: Ewan..we have to end it
Ewan: [smiles at her goof] ewan?! EWAN?!
Nic [jaw drops, clapses hand over mouth and begins to laugh]
Ewan: first the duke and now some twit named EWAN?! bloody hell you get around!
[Baz and crew laugh off camera]
Ewan: toulouse is gettin some too inn-he?
Nic:[ laughs harder]
Ewan: no wonder he was grinning like a fool today!
Nic: [still laughing] cut, CUT!
Sorry for such a long post 
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Rorschach
Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 2386
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| Posted: October 6, 2005 10:39 am Post subject: Moulin Rouge |
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Those are pretty funny. Since you’re an Ewan fan you must have seen him on Jay Leno when he was promoting Robots. That bit was hilarious.
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Hermione
Joined: Aug 4, 2005
Location: Planning An Anarchist Revolution
Posts: 581
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| Posted: October 6, 2005 6:25 pm Post subject: |
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^I agree
I think I watched that episode too. Did he slide on the floor or something like that? I just remember him being really hyper ( I have really bad memory)
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poeticdiamond
Joined: Sep 29, 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 67
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| Posted: October 6, 2005 8:46 pm Post subject: |
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I went out that night and didn't get back in time to watch it. *cries* But yes, I adore Ewan. He's so nice(and cute) <3
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Rorschach
Joined: Aug 15, 2005
Posts: 2386
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| Posted: October 6, 2005 9:04 pm Post subject: |
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| Hermione wrote: |
^I agree
I think I watched that episode too. Did he slide on the floor or something like that? I just remember him being really hyper ( I have really bad memory) |
Yeah I think so. I remember he sprayed Leno with Water, then Leno threw a cup of water at Ewan, then a water fight irrupted.
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Rorschach
Joined: Aug 15, 2005
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| Posted: October 6, 2005 9:06 pm Post subject: |
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| poeticdiamond wrote: |
| I went out that night and didn't get back in time to watch it. *cries* But yes, I adore Ewan. He's so nice(and cute) <3 |
You might be able to catch a re-run that was really funny though. It all started with a toy…
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poeticdiamond
Joined: Sep 29, 2005
Location: USA
Posts: 67
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| Posted: October 9, 2005 7:28 am Post subject: |
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Maybe that explains my middle signature pic
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Hermione
Joined: Aug 4, 2005
Location: Planning An Anarchist Revolution
Posts: 581
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| Posted: October 9, 2005 8:44 pm Post subject: |
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^ Yeah LOL!
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Rorschach
Joined: Aug 15, 2005
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| Posted: November 6, 2005 2:13 am Post subject: |
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| poeticdiamond wrote: |
| Maybe that explains my middle signature pic |
I guess it does.
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