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ravvy
Joined: Jul 25, 2007
Location: Sam's Closet
Posts: 8980
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 Posted: June 21, 2008 5:33 am Post subject: Relationships, Sleep Deprivation, and mountain dew. |
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Today is my 5 yr wedding anniversary and i thought i would take the time out and post something from the heart. please be aware that i have not slept since raevy was born and i am all hopped up on mtn dew. with that in mind here is my eternal wisdom about relationships.
all last week my mom visited and i know she means well but she pointed out every flaw and every bad thing about my husband. he has some bad habits, he tries to be controlling, he doesnt think before he speaks, etc.
and all last week brian and i have been at each others throats. we dont usually fight that much so i decided to think about our relationship and see where we were.
we have come a long long way... in august of 1999 my friend hooked us up, i lived in PA and they lived here in NY. he drove without having a picture to go by 8 hours to see me. a few months later i moved out here to NY and by an unfortunate turn of events ended up living at his parents house. (they didnt like that much)
my husband, as all men will go thru ladies so brace yourself, is stuck in the "i like to party and drink all night because i think i am still 16 even though i am in my 20's" stage of his life (not that drinking at 16 is good, i do not condone underage drinking, but the reality of it is such)
he went from guzzling a case of beer a night, down to a few on the weekend and that journey in itself was one of the hardest we have had, or mostly i have had, to endure.
at one point my dad got sick and asked us to come back and help him for awhile, we packed up and moved to PA. my husband will to this day swear that the paper had only 1 job listing because the area my father lives in is a poor area but i wont get you guys involved in the whole you could have driven further fight. but it came down to my dad healed, we got our own place, and brian took off.
it shattered my heart into a thousand pieces.
and even though my friends told me do not beg for him to come back i did.. i threw aside all pride and self worth and begged him to come back to me. and i am glad i did.
i dont recommend it because now i live in fear of losing him but thats just because my heart shattered so hard. i know he loves me.
after we returned to NY together we found an apartment and thats when we decided to set a date, get married, and now we have two beautiful children.
so where does that leave us?
my mom is right in pointing out all the things he does wrong. but i am no angel either. nothing short of him cheating on me or hurting our kids will get me to leave him. and i dont think thats what she meant, but i do not believe in divorce.. relationships take time, and effort.
and in my opinion it is not something to take lightly.. yes we fight but thats what makes us stronger. in fact if i ever stopped fighting he would worry because i am not the kind of person who just talks to anyone for any reason.
i only speak to people i like, or trust and theres not too many of you out there.
so all you lil teenie boppers with your crushes and hormones... take your time.
do not rush into a relationship or a rash decision (like the kids in NY who did a pregnancy pact and 17 kids purposely got knocked up in one year) thats just stupid. find yourself, your needs, and your career... then find your mate, your kids and your future.
love can be beautiful but that moment of bliss is followed my years of hard work.
~fin
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Wacky Macky
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:38 am Post subject: |
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That was touching, Rav. And what I've gonna say after this migh sound a bit screwy because I too have been up almost all night and am hopped up on sugar, haha.
That entire post was really touching, though. Just knowing that love can get you through so much is amazing. I hope to have something like you and Brian have some day, because it's obviously something amazing and I can tell just by what you said in that post how much you love him.
Happy anniversary, too. :]
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I know the distance is a factor, but I stretch as often as I can and my goal is to reach your hand any day now.
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Isabelle Lestrange
Joined: Jan 24, 2008
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:40 am Post subject: |
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Very touching. I like the idea of an 5th wedding anniversary being like that...
Happy anniversary!
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ravvy
Joined: Jul 25, 2007
Location: Sam's Closet
Posts: 8980
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:40 am Post subject: |
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| Wacky Macky wrote: |
That was touching, Rav. And what I've gonna say after this migh sound a bit screwy because I too have been up almost all night and am hopped up on sugar, haha.
That entire post was really touching, though. Just knowing that love can get you through so much is amazing. I hope to have something like you and Brian have some day, because it's obviously something amazing and I can tell just by what you said in that post how much you love him.
Happy anniversary, too. :] |
thank you love 
maybe in 5 more years i can give you guys an update
think al would be pissed if i dig up this thread then?
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zengrenouille
Joined: Aug 1, 2007
Location: Sharon, PA
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:41 am Post subject: |
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 That was beautiful!
Happy anniversary Ravvy and Mr Ravvy! Here's to many many more to come!
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Wacky Macky
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:41 am Post subject: |
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| ravvy wrote: |
| Wacky Macky wrote: |
That was touching, Rav. And what I've gonna say after this migh sound a bit screwy because I too have been up almost all night and am hopped up on sugar, haha.
That entire post was really touching, though. Just knowing that love can get you through so much is amazing. I hope to have something like you and Brian have some day, because it's obviously something amazing and I can tell just by what you said in that post how much you love him.
Happy anniversary, too. :] |
thank you love
maybe in 5 more years i can give you guys an update
think al would be pissed if i dig up this thread then? |
Probably, but he'll get over it haha. 
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I love you, Kevin. ♥ |
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ravvy
Joined: Jul 25, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 5:43 am Post subject: |
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thanx guys
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Michael Massacre
Joined: Nov 27, 2006
Location: Buffalo,NY!
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 7:13 am Post subject: |
Michael Massacre
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what i got was
in my case
beg for jill back.
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| lozinja wrote: |
first time i heard it i kinda laughed.
second time i was like o crap this is gonna be a hit, i'm going to hear it waaay too much and get so sick of it.
third time i turned the radio off. |
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ravvy
Joined: Jul 25, 2007
Location: Sam's Closet
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 7:31 am Post subject: |
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| Michael Massacre wrote: |
what i got was
in my case
beg for jill back. |
be careful when you do that though mike, brian thought for awhile he had the power to do as he wished because i begged for him to come back. a relationship isnt supposed to be like that. and i told him if he kept it up i would have to leave because i dont want to live in fear of being alone.
if you want jill back, talk to her sometimes it is just not worth saving but when it is... you must fight hard to keep it
theres so many times i wanted to give up, living with an alcoholic is not easy. and it is still a battle because i would love to never see alcohol again, but he is at a point where he only has a couple on the weekends and as long as he doesnt go back i am happy.
but also consider, that you have a whole lifetime of chances with women, if shes the one fight for it.. if not go find the right one.
i hope that made sense im so tired.
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GinnyX
Joined: May 6, 2007
Location: I'm in a New York state of mind.
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 9:17 am Post subject: |
GinnyX
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Happy Anniversary!!!!
And please don't worry about your mom. It is her right as a mother to critisize any man you choose. You could have chosen to be a nun and she'd critisize God. That's how moms are. But they only do it beacues they love you. If she didn't critisize, it would mean she doesn't care what kind of schlep you ended up with. SO be grateful she cares. 
Only because I love you... please don't be mad... http://shrimpurl.com/48t
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Kino
Joined: Dec 28, 2006
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 9:21 am Post subject: |
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Yeah Happy Anniversary Rav!! That made me think a lot about relationships and such, and it's the same thing I always tell my friends and myself. Nice writing, and I hope things work out for you .
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xXxArilellaxXx
Joined: May 22, 2008
Location: Out playing with the vampires =)
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 10:41 am Post subject: |
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Wow Ravvy, that was amazing and really touching, Happy 5th Year Anniversary, and hard work in relationships and parents and such means that everything does and eventually works out. So congratulations and i hope things get better for you
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teacakes
Joined: Aug 23, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 11:39 am Post subject: |
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Bahahaha I love all the people my age or, youngens thinking they can relate.
But anyways, I love you Ravvy and thanks for sharing, it was sad at times but always beautiful, just like you.
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GinnyX
Joined: May 6, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 11:48 am Post subject: |
GinnyX
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| teacakes wrote: |
Bahahaha I love all the people my age or, youngens thinking they can relate.
But anyways, I love you Ravvy and thanks for sharing, it was sad at times but always beautiful, just like you. |
You mean they can't relate to having to move in with their parents to help take care of them and have two children with their husband? Surely you jest.
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treehugger14
Joined: Oct 7, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 12:52 pm Post subject: |
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That was very touching Rav. <3
You have two of the cutest kids I've ever had the opportunity to meet on the internet. And (not trying to relate  ) even my mom picks out flaws in my sister's boyfriends, and mine when i had one. I agree with Ginny, it just means she cares!! LOVE YOU!
Happy Anniversary. Hopefully you have a great many more years to come!
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Arabella
Joined: Jun 17, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 12:55 pm Post subject: |
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happy anniversary ravvy! hire yourself a babehsitter and SLEEP.
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treehugger14
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 12:56 pm Post subject: |
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| Arabella wrote: |
| happy anniversary ravvy! hire yourself a babehsitter and SLEEP. |
I'm available tomorrow evening. =D
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ravvy
Joined: Jul 25, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 12:58 pm Post subject: |
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we never lived with the rents and kids. just parents then kids years later... and thank u gin for the link i know you love me and maybe i will find good info on there. and thanx juli, youre a sweet girl
and sleep, pants, whats that?!!
i wont sleep for 18 more years.
but at least i have you guys
and noobs
and mtn dew
oh and cant forget smexy!!
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GinnyX
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:37 pm Post subject: |
GinnyX
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| ravvy wrote: |
| we never lived with the rents and kids. just parents then kids years later... and thank u gin for the link i know you love me and maybe i will find good info on there. |
I didn't mean kids and parents at the same time, lol
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and sleep, pants, whats that?!!
i wont sleep for 18 more years. |
No, you'll stay awake all night wondering why the kids aren't calling you every day and where you went wrong. That's what my mom says, anyway.
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| but at least i have you guys |
always
leave the poor noobs alone 
NO MORE!
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| oh and cant forget smexy!! |
I never do.
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Wacky Macky
Joined: Jul 23, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:40 pm Post subject: |
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Ginny, there is always a time for more Mountain Dew. No bashing the best soft drink ever.
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I know the distance is a factor, but I stretch as often as I can and my goal is to reach your hand any day now.
I love you, Kevin. ♥ |
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GinnyX
Joined: May 6, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:43 pm Post subject: |
GinnyX
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| Wacky Macky wrote: |
Ginny, there is always a time for more Mountain Dew. No bashing the best soft drink ever. |
I'm not bashing it... I'm just explaining to ravvy the importance of high sugar contents in moderation.
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Wacky Macky
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:52 pm Post subject: |
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Nobody drinks Mountain Dew in moderation. Too tasty.
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I know the distance is a factor, but I stretch as often as I can and my goal is to reach your hand any day now.
I love you, Kevin. ♥ |
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teacakes
Joined: Aug 23, 2007
Location: Oz
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:54 pm Post subject: |
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*Emily gotted overlooked*
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GinnyX
Joined: May 6, 2007
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| Posted: June 21, 2008 1:55 pm Post subject: |
GinnyX
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